[Gum Review] Trident Layers

trident_layers_gumTrident Layers come in two different flavors, Green Apple + Golden Pineapple and Wild Strawberry + Tangy Citrus. I don’t usually chew fruit-flavored gum– actually I don’t chew gum in general unless I’m trying to cover the smell of prostitute drool and cheap booze when I go to church, and that isn’t all that often. However, I recently stumbled across a few pieces of each flavor of Trident Layers and decided to give them a chance.

Big mistake.

Before I talk about the differences I’ll discuss what both flavors have in common. They are both constructed in classic sandwich fashion, consisting of a dark layer of slime (either green or red depending on the flavor) smooshed between two small layers of gum. This gives the gum a unique presentation that is almost fancy on some level. Both gums also have long long lasting flavors and durable elasticity. It’s just too bad that you won’t want either flavor to last more than five seconds.

Green Apple + Golden Pineapple:

Before sticking the tiny stick of sandwich-like chewing gum in your mouth, you’ll be repulsed by an odor which smells like a dirty pillow case and cheap liquid hand soap. After the chewing process commences you’ll be hit by an overly powerful sour, Jolly Rancher-like flavor which quickly subsides and leaves an awkward combination of apple with a slight hint of pineapple and soap. It’s pretty gross.

Wild Strawberry + Tangy Citrus:

When I first put this flavor in my mouth I immediately gagged and wanted to spit it out. It tasted slightly of vomit with a disgustingly overpowering sourness and artificial Citrus flavor. After about a minute and a half of putting up with this flavor it was slowly replaced by a combination of orange and strawberry flavors that simply didn’t blend well together. This flavor was also disgusting.

Final Words:

Reactions to this gum seem pretty mixed. Some people can stand it and others, like myself, despise it. I cannot say, however, that I’ve met a single person who actually enjoys this gum enough to want to buy it or chew it on a regular basis. If you insist, feel free to try it for yourself, but I suggest just skipping out on this one.

Buy Green Apple + Golden Pineapple

Buy Wild Strawberry and Tangy Citrus

Score: 3.8/10 (Gross)

Green Apple + Pineapple: 4.25/10
Wild Strawberry + Tangy Citrus: 3.5/10

2 thoughts on “[Gum Review] Trident Layers

  1. I didn’t think the Strawberry Citrus flavor was terrible, but the flavor could last a little longer. I haven’t had green apple, but it just sounds gross.

  2. Do they still make Fruit Stripe gum? I’ve never chewed a piece of gum that had been stuck on someones show for the duration of a day, but I would imagine that was about the same as chewing it. Really fucking gross. This sounds bad as well.

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