Ahh, Monster Mixxd. What can I say about you that you can’t say better? A lot. Let’s see what you say about yourself:
Straight from the can:
It’s midnight Wednesday and the house party is about to go off. Everyone is jacked-up on the latest batch of jungle juice cooking in the kettle. Bring back any memories?
How can a little bit of everything taste so good and work so damned quick. That’s kinda what we were thinking when we came up with Monster MIXXD. We took a bunch of our back-up flavors, tossed ’em together, F-NA it’s a masterpiece.
Monster MIXXD has a juiced-up flavor you can’t describe and a creeper buzz you won’t deny.
Don’t take our word for it. Check it out yourself. If you don’t like MIXXD you can have your money back.
Now let’s see what I have to say about you, Monster Mixxd.
This is the third Juice Monster review, and man is it bad. Really bad. At least you can get your money back, right? Let’s see if it’s even worth that.
When you open the can you’ll notice a smell of wine and toenails. Yeah, those must’ve been a couple of the back-up flavors they were talking about. It’s a smell you can deal with, I guess, but it’s your right as a human being to quit right now while you’re ahead.
Still going? Alright, you’ve got bawls. Let’s taste it. Bad idea. Mixxd tastes kinda like really stale wine and some other gross things. I really don’t know, to be completely honest. It’s just plain bad, that’s the only way I can describe it. What makes it even worse is that the only can I’ve ever found is the 24oz supplement. Ugh, can you imagine drinking 24oz of cat musk, moose urine and human flesh extract? Me neither, but I’m just making sure everyone understands how bad I find this drink to be.
Like I just said, the only way I’ve ever found it was in the 24oz can for $2.49. Remember how good of a bargain Khaos and M-80 were, with their revolutionary ability to fit 150% and 180% substance into 100% of volume, respectively? Well, Mixxd drops in with 30% juice, 100% Monster, and too much% random and disgusting flavors. That comes to way too much suffering% for 100% volume! But you can get your money back if you don’t like it, and chances are you won’t.
It may sound like I’m just being hard on Monster MIXXD, and I really am. Understand that some people like and some people don’t. I obviously hate it, but Patricker loves it. If you get the chances to try it then go for it, after all if you don’t like it you’ll get your money back.
- Interesting concept
- Money back guarantee
- Only found in 24oz can
Overall: 5.3/10 (Safe to try due to money back guarantee)
Aroma: 4.0/10 (ugh)
Taste: 3.0/10 (ugh)
Value: 9/10 (money back guarantee means it’s basically free)