[Energy Drink Review] Slurm

Futurama is one of my favorite shows of all time, and it is easily one of the best television programs to hit the tube in recent years. The character, setting, concept, and execution all put this show far above most others during its much too short four season lifetime, after which it was criminally canceled by the selfish assholes at Fox. I’ll never forgive them.

In the television show, Slurm is the greatest canned beverage of the year 3000. Seemingly perfect in every way, there isn’t a single person who dislikes it. That is, of course, until it is discovered that Slurm consists purely and entirely of a giant worm’s anus discharge. Even after this discovery, main character Fry simply cannot get enough of the delightful green liquid. It’s that good.

I don’t know what kind of worm’s ass they are sucking this real life Slurm out of, but it tastes just how I’d expect a worm’s anus slime to taste. Continue reading

[TV News] Cartoon Network Celebrates the Living Dead!

All day today Cartoon Network is dedicating their schedule to celebrate the station’s “Zombie Day.” I don’t care what any of you say about my lack of pubic hair or underdeveloped hormones, this is totally awesome. I love cartoons, and I love zombies, so combining the two into one single awesome entity is like a Y7-rated wet dream for me.


Follow this link to see the scheduled listing for the rest of the day, and have a happy Zombie Day!