[Drink Review] Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade

Let me tell you how I came across this stuff.

I work in a grocery store, and I have the pleasure of meeting tons and tons of new and unique people all the time. Some are old, some are young. Some smile, some frown. Some are in shape and others ride scooters through the store, loading up on Diet Coke, frozen pizzas and Banquet Meals. However, the other day I met a lady that was an entirely unique individual.

It was a small order on a hot day, the heat index was about 104 degrees, and where I work we have to wear long black pants as part of our dress code, despite the fact that, as a bagger, I spend a few hours out of every shift pushing carts on a hot black top. Needless to say, I was sweaty. When this particular customer walked through my line, she had a bottle of Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade. I looked at it, coveting it with intense jealousy. I wanted this.

I told her how delicious it looked, how it looked like it would hit the spot, how intense my cart shifts were, and asked her how much it was. My plan was just to buy some on my break, but this customer had a different idea in mind. After hearing my gushing over her lemonade, she asked me a question. “What happened in 1066?” The answer to that question would be the only thing that stood between me and 32 oz of delicious Mango Lemonade.

Luckily, equipped with my HTC Hero, I was allowed to look it up so long as I could give her a respectable summary before she got in her car and left. Guess what. I did. She gave me the Lemonade, and I drank it. It was perfect. No, not exactly perfect, though Clay Cunningham might lead you to believe so, but really good none-the-less. Oh and in case you are ever wondering, the Battle of Hastings took place in 1066, leading to the successful conquering of England by Normandy. This led to the Magna Carta, a document that eventually helped build the Declaration of independence.

Review:

What’s that? You don’t care? You just want to know about the lemonade? Oh, of course. It is absolutely delicious.

Everything from the aroma to the texture to the flavor is just absolutely fantastic and pleasant in just about every manner. The pleasant aroma, citric and sweet, balanced so well that it puts every other lemonade to shame. The flavor is the absolute shining star, as it is a wonderful blend of sweet mango and sour lemon, sitting on top of a delightfully soft and comfortable texture. Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade hits the spot and refreshes unlike anything I’ve every experienced in my entire life.

Though I admit this product is near perfect, it does have a few flaws that hold it back, but only a few. The first of my short list of complaints is that it leaves a bit of a sticky feeling at the back of your throat. It’s also a bit expensive, clocking in at four bucks for a 32 oz bottle, making it just a bit too much for a broke (community) college student like me to be able to consume it regularly.

My final complaint is that, for some sad reason, a single bottle doesn’t last forever, meaning that regardless of how many smiles and moments of true happiness your first bottle will induce, it will always end in heart break, forcing you to move on to a new bottle. But never forget the ones you’ve loved in the past, cherish every moment you spent with them. Just be sure not to dwell on what once was and enjoy the present moment.

Final Words:

Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade is one of the most delicious and refreshing products I’ve ever encountered, and that is no exaggeration. While I can’t say comfortably and with confidence that there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, I will say that any flaws in the products design are so underwhelming that you will hardly notice the slight stickiness in your throat or the aftertaste that, while not unpleasant, sticks around a bit longer than you’d like.

This is one that I’m encouraging everyone to go out and buy. Find it in the health drinks section of your local grocer, or ask a clerk if you don’t want to look for it. It is absolutely delicious and should be experienced by everyone.

Score: 9.75/10 (Outstanding, near perfection)

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